Impending doom.....or not

Apologies for anyone expecting to read a list of 5 great Everton moments, or something similarly churlish and...well....fun. This blog post is going to be a slightly more serious and meaningful one. Many of you will know that any day now, my wife Debbie will be giving birth to our first child. She's 38 weeks and 3 days now - and she's doing absolutely great! It's dawned on me though that life is about to change in just about the biggest way imaginable for us. We've been married for over 6 years now - together for over 11 - and we've had a wonderfully blessed and happy time. We love each other's company, and while we have certain responsibilities which keep us very busy, we generally have gone through life together with a good measure of control and certainty about what's happening. We've trusted God for everything - money, shelter, food, warmth etc - and he has provided for us abundantly. When we've had a passion to do something or go somewhere, we've largely been able to do it - without fear of how it impacts on the lives of people around us. In short, it's been a blast, and we'd pretty much not change anything that we've experienced together.

So what on earth are we doing having a baby!? At some point during the next 25 days or so, my wife is going to emit a tiny little person, which will hopefully in some way resemble one/both of us, and who will change our lives forever. That freedom we've had which has enabled us to come and go as we please, to chase our goals and dreams, to live with relative ease - much of that is about to disappear. Lost somewhere, in a pile of dirty nappies, sick-stained muslins and a never ending assortment of tiny clothes and soft toys. Sleep is going to become very, very disrupted, our social lives are going to become much more difficult, and our energy levels are going to plummet. The house will at times be filled with screaming and crying, it will smell of poo, and Debbie is going to be getting through a massive stack of nipple-cream (ouch).
And that's not to mention the huge financial impact a baby has on a couple! I heard recently that the average cost of raising a baby from 0-21 in the UK is £193,000! That's over £9k a year we need to find - with my wife earning less than before!

In our church we have seen something like 20 new born babies enter the scene in the last couple of years - and our friends have let us know in no uncertain terms just how much life is going to change for us, as it has for them. Some have had babies who have been relatively predictable, routine-loving and easy to look after. Others have had much harder times. Every baby is different - we have learnt - and we have been so inspired by all of the couples we know who have had them recently, as we have watched them adapt and grow into parenthood. But it's impossible not to see the massive effect each baby has had on the lives of each couple - it's simply massive.
With all this expectation of upheaval, sleep-deprivation and financial ruin, it's little wonder that we have jokingly taken to referring to our forthcoming child as 'Impending Doom'.

'Impending Doom' - at 20wks...

So...why are we doing this? Why would anyone choose to give up a life of fun, freedom and comfort for a life of stress, tiredness and financial strain? Why have we chosen to give up that freedom we have had which has has enabled us to pursue our dreams and ambitions without much of a care in the world?

The answer is simple: this IS our dream and our ambition. We have longed for this moment - this chance to start a family, to raise a child together, to be parents. This IS what we've always dreamed of! We didn't want to do it straight away - these years gone by have been so important to us. I can't deny there's a twinge of sadness as we wave goodbye to a phase of life we have known and loved together. But we're just so excited to take this next step on our journey together. God has blessed us now with the amazing privilege of becoming parents - a privilege which not everyone gets to enjoy - and we don't take this lightly. We've put a lot of prayer and passion into getting even this far, and we've done a lot of homework! And now we're just so full of anticipation of what is to come. I simply cannot wait to see my baby's face for the first time - to hold it in my arms and to know that I am a father - and to know that I am a father married to an beautiful, wonderful mother. Inside I feel a crazy tangle of excited, nervous, impatient, worried and joyful! I just hope and pray that we have a safe birth, a healthy baby and many, many years of happiness together as a family.

The days gone by have been special - the days to come are going to be even more so. We thank God for blessing us with this baby, and far from being 'impending doom', deep down, we know that whatever befalls, this is actually forthcoming joy.