Wednesday 29 December 2010

Top 6 Everton Moments of 2010

2010, it has to be said, has been a really strange year to be an Evertonian. The back end of 2009 (the start of the 09/10 Premier League season) was a massive disappointment, with injuries and the 'Lescott Saga' seroiusly affecting the league and European form of the Toffeemen. But as 2010 kicked in, Everton stepped up a few gears, and their strong second half of the season saw them climb to 8th by May. The finishing position was unspectacular - and perhaps a little harsh given the superb form in the second half of the season. Memorable victories over Chelsea, Manchester United and Manchester City certainly gave the season a positive spin - despite the lack of European football to look forward in 2010/11. Undoubtedly though, Everton had paid the price for their crisis-ridden start. 
That superb 2nd half of the campaign meant that there was real optimism around the club over the summer. Having had torrid off-seasons for the past few years, Evertonians were more than satisfied to see the club seemingly enjoying a stable summer. Only Jermaine Beckford, Jan Mucha, Joao Silva and Magaye Gueye were added to the squad. Of much more significance was the tying of Mikel Arteta to a new long term contract. Although Steven Pienaar hadn't made the same commitment, he was at least still at the club. Things were looking good.
So imagine the frustration, surprise and anger as Everton started the 10/11 campaign in awful fashion. An inability to turn draws into wins has cost the team dear. Despite some excellent football, and often dominating possession and chances. Everton's strikers have not done the business in front of goal, at the end of year, the side languishes in lower-mid table. A derby win against the neighbours, a stunning injury comeback against Man Utd, and a brilliant away win at Man City have been rare bright spots in a first half of the season which, frankly, has not been anywhere near good enough. Only a run like the end of the 09/10 season will heal the wounds for many Evertonians, who have once again seen bright promise turn to disappointment thus far.
So, as we see out 2010, we might as well try and remember some fond moments for Everton from the calendar year.
1. Marouane Fellaini shows his quality at last - Everton 2 - 0 Manchester City, January 16th 2010
As the club's record signing, the pressure had been on young Marouane Fellaini from the start of his Everton career. His slow pace and penchant for fouling had left many Evertonians wondering if he was really cut out for Premier League football. David Moyes didn't seem sure either - choosing to use the Belgian almost exclusively as a target man in his first season. However, in 2009/10 he started to really show signs that he was adapting to life in England, and finally started to excel in the position he'd been signed to play in - at the heart of midfield. The match against Manchester City had been pencilled in by many Evertonians as a grudge match, after the bad blood created by the Joleon Lescott saga. Goodison was a bear-pit that evening, and the blues secured an excellent 2-0 win thanks to goals from Steven Pienaar and Louis Saha. However, it was the performance of Fellaini which most thrilled Evertonians. He covered every blade of grass, and ran the show from the middle of the park. His virtuoso performance was capped off by a magic moment - when he executed a perfect 'Zidane turn' around a completely bewildered Craig Bellamy. The trick brought the stadium to its feet in appreciation, and summed up both Fellaini and Everton's dominance on the day. 


2. Everton 2 - 1 Chelsea - February 10th 2010
It had been chuffing AGES since Everton had beaten Chelsea, and on the back of a gutting 1-0 reverse to Liverpool the weekend before - in which Everton had lost the in-form Fellaini for the rest of the season to an ankle injury - hopes weren't high that February evening. Confidence was shaken further when Chelsea strode into the lead, with Florent Malouda netting after just 16 minutes. But Everton - despite the Anfield setback - had discovered a new resilience in 2010, and with loan signing Landon Donovan proving a massive hit, they set about working their way back into the game. It was the American's whipped corner which was met by Lousi Saha on 32 minutes to level the scores. And Donovan was at it again just before half time, when his driving run into the penalty area was halted  illegally by Ricardo Carvalho. This gave Saha the chance to send Everton into an unlikely half time lead. Alas, his penalty was repelled by Petr Cech, and many Evertonians would have been forgiven for thinking that the Blues would not get a better chance to gain an advantage over Chelsea.
However, a misjudgement by an out of sorts John Terry (something playing on his mind, perhaps?!) allowed Saha a shot at redemption on 74th minute, and the Frenchman needed no further invitation, chesting the ball down and lashing a left-foot volley past Cech which sent Goodison into raptures.


3. Everton 3 - 1 Manchester United - February 20th 2010
How do you follow a rare league victory over a team like Chelsea? By beating the Champions! On a crisp, sunny day at Goodison, Everton produced a superb performance to secure another come-from-behind win, this time against Sir Alex's men. When Dimitar Berbatov slotted United into a 15th minute lead, it seemed that Man Utd would do what they so often did, and coast to victory at Goodison. But Everton had other ideas, and a quite stupendous strike from Russian midfielder Diniyar Bilyaletdinov just 3 minutes later ensured that the Blues were right back in it. The game ebbed and flowed into the 2nd half, but it was Everton who seemed more likely and more keen to get a winner. The turning point came thanks to a brilliant David Moyes subsitution. Despite his goal, Bilyaletdinov had drifted out of the game, and was replaced on 69 minutes by young midfielder Dan Gosling. Just a few minutes later, Steven Pienaar's cutback found its way to Gosling, who instinctively poked his toe at the ball, and diverted it into the back of the Glwadys Street net. Bedlam. As United pressed for an equaliser, Everton stood firm, and another Moyes subsitution paid dividends to wrap the game up late on. Jack Rodwell entered the fray in the 87th minute, and confirmed his huge potential by strolling through a bamboozled United defence and slotting past a helpless Van der Saar to seal the deal in the last minute of normal time. Goodison was made for days like this. 


4. Manchester City 0 - 2 Everton - March 24th 2010
As mentioned earlier, there was no love lost between these two teams in 2010. So it was all the more fantastic that Everton completed the double over City in March, with a well-earned 2-0 win. Tim Cahill nodded home a cleverly worked free kick between Baines and Arteta in the first half. And the points were sealed when Jack Rodwell escaped down the right wing, and pulled the ball back to Mikel Arteta (via a Tim Cahill dummy), who dispatched the ball into the bottom corner. The celebrations after that goal will live long in the memory of all who were there that night. Unbridled joy!




5. Arteta's equaliser - Everton 3 - 3 Manchester United - September 11th 2010
Everton don't really do comebacks - not under Moyes - and certainly not against United! The team found themselves 3-1 down to the rampant reds, despite having taken the lead through Pienaar in the first half. The game was seemingly meandering to its natural conclusion, when Leighton Baines swung a cross into the area in injury time, which was met superbly by Cahill. 2-3 - but few batted an eyelid. It was merely a consolation, and United would surely shut up shop now. From the kick-off, Everton won the ball back, and worked forward down the left. Pienaar and Baines linked well, for the left-back to cross to Cahill again. This time, the Aussie couldn't quite win the header, but the ball fell invitingly for Mikel Arteta, who slammed the ball home from 12 yards with the help of a deflection. Goodison went absolutely mental - the fans barely believing their eyes. At the end of the day, it was only a draw, but to score two in injury time like was almost unheard of for Everton, and will be remembered for a long time.


6. Derby victory - Everton 2 - 0 Liverpool - October 17th 2010
Derby wins have been annoyingly infrequent under David Moyes, but this one was about as comprehensive as most Evertonians could hope for. Both Merseyside clubs had endured torrid starts to the season - albeit under very different circumstances - and Liverpool in particular had just been through an historic week. A change in ownership had finally been secured, and things were perhaps looking a bit brighter for the Reds as they arrived at Goodison. Any optimism was quickly wiped away though, as Everton powered to a convincing win. Tim Cahill got the ball rolling in the first half, thumping Seamus Coleman's cut-back into the roof of the net to send the crowd wild. And the victory was sealed early in the second half, when Arteta lashed home from 20 yards after Liverpool only half cleared a corner. The rest of the game saw Liverpool huff and puff, with Everton stoically defending their lines, and rarely looking troubled. A great win for Everton - but although Liverpool haven't really recovered since, Everton have also failed to kick on from this victory.

Wednesday 22 December 2010

Unnamed Sports Podcast - Ep. 2 - The Top 10 Sporting Moments of 2010

Listen to Episode 2 of the Unnamed Sports Podcast with Mark Dorey and Chris Butland here:

Below is a list of our 10 most memorable sporting moments of 2010! For 9 of them, video links are supplied. The tenth, I'm afraid, was not captured by the world's cameras! These are in no particular order, but don't forget to vote on your favourite - and let us know any of your other favourite 2010 sporting moments.


1. Graeme McDowell secures the Ryder Cup for Europe.



2. Frank Lampard's goal that never was - England v Germany, World Cup 2010





3. Isner and Mahut - Isner wins the longest ever tennis match.



4. Tony McCoy wins the Grand National at the 15th attempt
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/other_sports/horse_racing/8611001.stm




5. Audley Harrison defeats Michael Sprott - one handed!



6. Chris Ashton's brilliant try for England against Australia - Twickenham test match.



7. Luis Suarez's handball for Uruguay v Ghana - World Cup Quarter Final



8. Amy Williams wins Skeleton gold for Team GB - Winter Olympics 2010



9.The New Orleans Saints execute a surprise onside kick against the Indianapolis Colts - Superbowl 2010



10. FC Gateway's 'great escape' from relegation, on the final day of the Yorkshire Christian Football League season.
http://www.ycfl.org.uk/cgi-bin/fixture.cgi?cmd=view&id=648







Tuesday 21 December 2010

10 Cracking Songs from 2010

As 2010 draws to a close, it's time to reflect on the music that been making me tick this year. Some of them are songs from great albums - from which I could have picked any song really. Others, though, are rare, fleeting moments of genius from artists whom ordinarily I probably couldn't care less about. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day, eh?! So...without further ado, and in no particular order:


1. Surfer Blood - "Floating Vibes"

This album opener from Florida's Surfer Blood sets the tone perfectly for an upbeat album, full of guitar led surfer rock goodness. Their sound is supplemented by the excellent percussive work of Marcos Marchesani - who to be honest, looks like a bit of a mentalist. There's more than a little hint of Weezer and Pavement in there, which can't be a bad thing! Fun music - and with the album released in January, it juuuust qualifies for this selection!


2. Vampire Weekend - 'White Sky'

Funnily enough, the second track on my list also comes from an album with a January release here in the UK. After their hugely addictive eponymous debut album, I was intrigued as to what Vampire Weekend would do next. Their sound was very distinctive - borrowing heavily from 'Graceland' era Paul Simon (an album I can't stop listening to, recently), and one wondered how much longevity they would have. Thankfully, their 2nd album, 'Contra' was a triumph - different enough from their debut to be interesting and exciting, but maintaining the successful formula they'd struck upon. This track shows lead singer Ezra Koenig at his squeaky, quirky best, and was the stand-out number for me from the very first listen of the album.


3. Belle and Sebastian feat.Norah Jones - 'Little Lou, Ugly Jack, Prophet John'

What do you get when you cross one of my favourite bands ever, with a stellar recording artist with a gorgeous voice? Well, you get this delicious little song. It actually appears on two albums - Belle and Seb's 'Write About Love', and Jones' album of collaborations, 'Featuring Norah Jones'. Again, I fell in love with this song on first listen, and it's not got old yet. Warm but melancholic.


4. Beach House - 'Zebra'

Beach House, natives of Baltimore, have had to wait some time to find some genuine success over on these shores. Despite being acclaimed by the likes of Pitchfork.com for some time, it was 2010's 'Teen Dream' which saw them really hit the ground running in the UK, after 6 years together. Again, there's a surfer element to this band, but theirs is a much more wistful, oceanic sound, as opposed to bouncy and rocky. The voice of Victoria Legrande is the key feature of their sound - low and husky, and fitting perfectly to the songs.


5. The Tallest Man on Earth - 'A Lion's Heart'

There's so much great music coming out of Scandinavia at the moment! Enough to write a separate blog post about, actually - but I'll save that for another sound. The guitar playing throughout this album ('The Wild Hunt') is just lovely, but it's very obviously the voice of Kristian Mattson sets him apart from other acoustic acts out there. It may take you aback at first, but once you're used to it, there's real depth and beauty to each of the songs.


6. Sleigh Bells - 'Rill Rill'

This New York duo are a bit of a hit and miss case for me. I've heard some stuff that I just can't get into, to be honest. But this track is superb. There's a hint of M.I.A in there with that kind of samply, noisy feel. Again, it's a feel-good track for me, and one that deserves a mention even if the rest of their stuff doesn't float my boat.


7. Deerhunter - 'Helicopter'

Taken from the superb 'Halcyon Digest' album, this song is just beautiful. Crafted superbly, it's a classic example of the experimental band and their ability to pull sounds out of nowhere to make them into works of art. Brilliantly done.


8. S. Carey - In The Dirt

Having spent some time touring with the brilliant Bon Iver, as his drummer, it's no surprise that Sean Carey was inspired to put our an album of his own - and I'm so glad he did! It's a beautiful effort, with some really captivating tracks. This song is a typical of his ability to build a song with layers, adding them and removing them as he feels appropriate, building to a beautiful crescendo. Sublime.


9. Broken Social Scene - 'All To All'

I was massively excited when BSS - a collective hotch-potch of up to 20-odd Canadian musicians - released another studio album this year. And while 'Forgiveness Rock Record' did not, for me, match the heights of some of their previous stuff, this song stuck out for me as being flipping brilliant. It's helped by the fact that its lead vocal is provided by the lovely Lisa Lobsinger, of little known band 'Reverie Sound Revue', but as well as that, I just love the way it all fits together. It's a bit of a different sound for BSS, a but more electronic and atmospheric, but it really works.


10. Delorean - 'Stay Close'

And now, for something completely different! Not my usual style of music, this, but I just love it. Delorean are described as an 'alternative dance' band - whatever that means. For me, the track makes me feel sunny, floaty, and nice. And that's enough for me!

Saturday 18 December 2010

Top 5 Christmas Songs

Feeling festive yet? After last yesterday's mammoth work Christmas do, I'm feeling pretty Christmassy now. I'm finally ready to enjoy a Snowball, munch on a mince pie, and listen to some Christmas tunes!
Now, there have been many, many Christmas songs written and recorded down the years - both sacred and secular. To be honest though, the vast majority of them have been utterly garbage.
For me, there are but a handful of really top quality Chrimbo tunes, and the 5 below certainly go some way to making me feel merry as opposed  to wanting to throw my radio in the roasting hot oven with the turkey.
Hope you enjoy them!

1. The Waitresses - 'Christmas Wrapping'

This is almost certainly one of those Christmas songs which you won't recognise by name, but you'll know it as soon as you hear it! I like it because it's actually a pretty good piece of music, it tells a story, and it's not too schmulzy or cheesy. The song tells the tale of a girl who is having a lonely, miserable Christmas, largely born of frustration at not managing to develop a relationship with a guy she met on holiday. She recounts several tales of woe, as attempts to snare this guy failed during the year. But thankfully, there's a happy ending, as the pair finally meet up quite by accident - thanks to the fact they both needed to make last minute emergency trips to the same shop to buy cranberry sauce! Yay!
There's no original video for this song, by the way - so instead enjoy the frankly mental efforts of some American person who has spent copious amounts of time and money and a Christmas lights system which is choreographed to the music!

2. The Pogues and Kirsty McColl - 'The Fairytale of New York'

I don't think this one needs too much introduction. But once again it is slightly unique in that it's a genuinely brilliant bit of music, with a good story. It's also based around New York - my favourite city in the whole world (apart from Liverpool - of course).
RIP Kirsty McColl by the way - run over by a speedboat. What a way to go! It's incredible that she was somehow outlived by Shane McGowan - how he's still alive is beyond me!
If you're particularly interested in this song by the way, there is a whole documentary about it! It's in 6 parts on youtube - fill your boots:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

3. Mariah Carey - 'O Holy Night'

Ok...ok. I might get some stick for this. For one, it's not the Mariah Carey song that springs to mind for most people at this time of year. Obviously her big one was 'All I Want For Christmas Is You', which is a pretty good song in itself. But for me, her version of the brilliant carol , 'O Holy Night' is head and shoulders above it - and not to mention far more meaningful ("A thrill of hope - the weary world rejoices" - remember the reason for the season, folks!).
This live take is absolutely stunning, to be honest. The gospel choir is a great addition, and Mariah's vocal is just flawless. Absolutely incredible. I'm not a fan of Mariah Carey the person/diva - nor do I particularly like her style of music. But sometimes I just hear her sing and the quality, range and tone of her voice just takes my breath away. From about 2mins in, this performance just becomes more and more special. The high note she hits at 2min48 of this song is just another level altogether - and she's pretty heavily pregnant too! X-Factor wannabes take note - THIS is how it's done!

4. Joni Mitchell - 'River'

I never said that all the best Christmas songs were happy! This track by Joni Mitchell - from her amazing album, 'Blue', is actually a bit of a tear jerker. Everyone's enjoying Christmas, 'putting up reindeer and singing songs of joy and peace'. Everyone, that is, except Joni. She's mourning the loss of a relationship - with several references to her 'baby', who has evidently left her after she drove him away. The chorus speaks of homesickness in her personal life too. A Canadian by birth, Joni was at this time living in California - not a place famed for it's wintery Christmas scenes. It's reckoned Joni was missing her homeland - the chance to skate down frozen rivers not befalling her in sunny Cali. It's a mournful song, but I love the way she works  the Jingle Bells motif into the song, somehow making it sound wistful and longing, rather than happy and joyful. Really beautifully done, by one of my all time favourite artists.

5. Beach Boys - 'Little St Nick'

I coulnd't end it on such a depressing note, could I? Here's a much more upbeat number. My love for the awesome brilliant harmonies of the Beach Boys has already been documented on this blog. Here they take the unusual step of mixing Christmas sentiment with surfer pop - a reminder that Christmas ain't cold for everyone! It's almost the exact same rhythm section to another one of their hits - Little Deuce Coupe - with the all important addition of some sleigh bells! But who cares?! It's a joyful Christmas ditty with their signature stamp on it. Can't be bad!

Thursday 16 December 2010

Introducing: The Unnamed Sports Podcast!

It's here. Finally. My sporty blogging friend, Mark Dorey and I have taken our first tentative, petrified steps into podcasting!
We're both sports fans, and we can both talk a fair bit, so we thought we'd step out and have bash at recording ourselves and seeing if it's of interest to anyone!

Any feedback welcome - we know it's rough around the edges, and hopefully it will only get better from here!

Included in this episode:
Our thoughts on the Premier League title race
My irrational hatred of Stuart Broad (and our 3rd Ashes test match preview)
The three best sporting plays of the last week.

Also - you'll notice that we don't yet have a name for our little project - we'd welcome any suggestions!

Below you'll find the videos which accompany the 3 plays of the week feature - some cracking stuff there:


Lionel Messi v Real Sociedad - goals 1 and 2




DeSean Jackson touchdown for Philadelphia Eagles against Dallas Cowboys



Andrew Strauss takes a wicket against Victoria!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/cricket/england/9278076.stm

Wednesday 15 December 2010

4 tv comedy shows no longer with us

So far I've blogged largely about football, music and food - probably 3 of my biggest passions in life. But I'm also a lover of comedy. Obviously there's a huge amount of hit and miss in terms of what hits our screens, but down the years there have been many programmes which have had me in stitches - some clever, some obvious, some slapstick, some crude. Frasier, Friends, and others are the obvious ones which I could watch over and over again. But here are some other shows which perhaps had a shorter shelf-life, but were nonetheless funny.

1. 'The Day Today'
The Day Today was essentially a spoof news programme, parodying the ever-increasingly serious and uber-professional world of news broadcasting. Created by Chris Morris and Armando Ianucci in 1994, it contained a whole gamut of mini-characters - including a certain Alan Partridge, who would go on to much bigger and better things. Each episode would contain all sorts of crazy news stories - such as the Queen and Prime-Minister getting into a punch up - and each story was brought to life by the brilliant cast of reporters. One character who really tickled me every time was the hapless economics reporter, Peter O'Hanrahanrahan, played by Patrick Marber. His relationship with the news anchor - played by Chris Morris - was obviously very fractured, with Morris regularly lambasting his reported for factual inaccuracies in his pieces to camera. Watching him squirm was always great fun! Here's one of his best bits:



2. This Morning With Richard Not Judy
TMWRNJ was a project which lasted for two series, fronted by comedians Stewart Lee and Richard Herring. The show comprised of sketches and studio based material, and contained some fantastic mini-characters, such as The Curious Orange, Nostradamus and his horse David Collins, and Histor - the history teaching pirate crow! The dynamic of the hosts really worked, and I used to rush home from church to catch each Sunday lunch-time show with my brother! Here are couple of my favourite clips:




3. Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
I discovered this show quite by accident whilst at a friend's house for a bit of a gathering. We were just channel hopping really while other people were chatting away, and we stumbled across this show and were transfixed, confused, and very, very amused. It's very hard to explain - it's probably easiest if you just read the wiki entry at the link above, and then enjoy the clip below!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pQXGId_Oe4&has_verified=1

4. People Like Us
This is my favourite I think. Brilliant, brilliant tv. A subtle mockumentary which followed 'ordinary' people around in several key professions (one per episode) in order to give a flavour of what it's like to live a day in their shoes. The hapless, bumbling interviewer, Roy Mallard, almost never appears on camera, adding to the genius of the show. The rather sad thing about this though is that the show's invisible star, Chris Langham, went on to be locked up in real life for some rather unsavoury business. Nevertheless, it seems he's moved on now, and it shouldn't detract from the absolute genius of this programme. All of the shows are available to watch on youtube, I'm delighted to say! I've linked one below...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yibo8iB7VEM&has_verified=1

Sunday 12 December 2010

Moyes In - for now.

I've been in a quandry this weekend, ever since the final whistle of Everton's 0-0 draw with Wigan Athletic. Not that my opinion matters a jot - but I've been really struggling to decide whether David Moyes really has taken Everton as far as he can. The question on the lips of many Evertonians has, once again, "Moyes in or Moyes out?"
Historically when Everton have gone on awful runs under Moyes, the moment I've started to doubt (publicly or privately), the team has gone on some brilliant run and it's all been rosy again - making me look like an impatient fool. The last time (the only time) I've reached this point before was at the start of the 2005/06 season, when Everton were dumped out of Europe and embarked on an 8 game streak in the league in which they not only didn't win a match, but they didn't score a goal. But Moyes gradually turned it around. The team finished 11th, and followed it up next season by qualifying for Europe. I had to eat my words.
So I feel loathe to come out and say that this is Moyes' fault and that someone else should be given a go. Don't get me wrong - I'm tempted. What makes this year unique is the lack of an excuse to account for it. In the past when the team has struggled under Moyes, there has been a mitigating circumstance. There have been injuries, European elimination shell-shock, or the long drawn-out saga of losing a key player to a Premiership rival. This time though, Moyes is working with a squad which he claims is his best to date, and one which isn't blighted by injury or unrest. So what excuse is there for a run that has seen just 3 Premier League wins in 17? What possible reason can there be to drop home league points to Wolves, West Brom, Bolton. Newcastle and now Wigan?
Typically, Everton have started seasons poorly under Moyes, before he gradually steadies things and turns the team around to roar home in the latter half of the season. But when does a 'poor start' become a 'bad season'. We're 17 games in - almost halfway through. This doesn't appear to be a blip.
It's worrying. Very worrying. But after really, really thinking about it, I'm still refusing to go all out and say "Moyes out". My reasons for still backing him are thus:

  • His past success - achieved on minimal budgets and against the odds - has bought him the right to be given some patience.
  • He has an opportunity in January to do some transfer deals - both in and out - which could save the season.
  • Other teams have not pulled away so far as to put Everton in a position of no hope. A similar run to last season in the last 21 games would possibly put the team back in the European places.
  • So many dropped points this season have come in games where the team has dominated, but individuals have failed to execute in attack or defence.
  • Quite simply, there's no one else who could do a better job.

For now then, I'm going to remain patient. How much longer, I don't know. But at the moment I feel there is little alternative to do anything but back the manager to get through to his players and steady the ship.
In Moyes We Trust.



But ask me again in January....

Saturday 11 December 2010

Food Rules. Number 2 - CHOCOLATE BARS

When is a chocolate bar a chocolate bar and not a chocolate biscuit? This is a question which has plagued mankind ever since...erm....well, certainly since I've been alive.

I've had many a heated debate with friends, family and work colleagues over what counts as a chocolate bar, and what is a chocolate biscuit. For me, it's actually very simple - but for others there appears to be great confusion. Friends of mine are adamant the likes of Penguins, Gold Bars, Breakaways, Kit Kats etc are chocolate biscuits and not bars. But to me, that is just preposterous. A chocolate digestive or a chocolate hob-nob - now THESE are chocolate biscuits. What's the difference, I hear you ask?

Well, it's easy, to be honest. All you need to do, whenever you're eating your chocolate based snack, is ask yourself the following four questions. I guarantee you that once you have honestly answered the four questions, you will have a thoroughly reliable and comprehensive answer:

1. Is the item bar shaped? 
By 'bar shaped', I mean, essentially, two longer sides and with two shorter ends. So - think of the shape of a Mars Bar, and then allow variations on that theme. Twix, Curly Wurly, Penguin, Flake - all tecnically bar shaped. If it has equal length sides, all the way around, then its a square. If it's round, it's a circle. Therefore, not a bar. Simple!


2. Is the filling - whatever it is - entirely encased in solid milk or dark chocolate?
Again - pretty straightforward. If the bar shape is completely covered in chocolatey goodness, then it's halfway there to being a chocolate bar! This is an important distinction though - and it does rule some important contenders out. For example, the Cadbury's Brunch Bar is a delicious snack, and does have a chocolatey bottom and sides. However, the top of the bar is entirely uncovered by chocolate, and therefore it misses out on the distinction of being a chocolate bar. 
You'll also notice that I've specified that it must be milk or dark chocolate. Why? White chocolate is NOT actually chocolate. It doesn't contain cocoa solids - despite having its origin from the cocoa plant bean. It's made of the butter rather than the solids of the bean. Unlucky....

3. Is it individually wrapped?
A huge one this. This gets rid of a lot of contenders which might have met the criteria of 1 and 2 above. Matchmakers, Chocolate Fingers etc - they're not in their own individual wrappers, so they can't be chocolate bars. Some may point out the anomalies here - Twix, Drifter, Twirl etc - all have TWO bars inside their wrappers. Well, I suppose every rule has its exceptions. I think two pieces can be contained within one wrapper. A Twix with only one finger just wouldn't really feel 'right'. 


4. Is the item 3 inches (or longer) in length?
This rule is important. Some people might look at the first three questions, and then pick up a Quality Street sweet - such as a toffee finger or fudge - and note that it is  bar shaped, entirely covered in chocolate, and individually wrapped. "Aha!", they might exclaim. "A chocolate bar!!!". Well, they'd be wrong. Quality Street, Roses, Miniature Heroes, Celebrations etc - they're sweets. They're obviously sweets! If you asked someone to buy you a bar of chocolate and they presented you with a toffee finger, you'd laugh in their face and send them away to rectify the situation. For a chocolate bar to truly be a chocolate bar, it ought to be around 3 inches or more in length. A Penguin is about right.

So - if you're holding a chocolatey snack in your hand, and you've asked yourself those 4 questions, and the answer to all of those 4 questions is 'Yes' - then CONGRATULATIONS!! You've got yourself a chocolate bar! Enjoy :-)

Thursday 9 December 2010

Food rules. Number 1 - the Golden Rule - NO FRUIT AND MEAT

Fruit and Meat should not be mixed together. Ever! It seems simple to me - and I am genuinely shocked that anyone might think otherwise. But over the years I've ended up in some really heated debates about this controversial culinary issue. I've never been a big fan of mixing the sweet and the savoury in any form, but I can see how some things might work. For example, a bit of a Yorkshire tradition is eating Christmas cake with a good piece of stilton. Sounds awful, but to be fair, it does work.

However, I simply cannot allow the mixing of sweet, juicy fruits with savoury, meaty...erm...meats. Sweet fruits are lovely - but for pudding. I cannot for the life of me understand why you'd want to sweeten meat. It's MEANT to be savoury and chewy and flavoursome. It doesn't need to be tainted by fruit. Also - if people were going to be consistent, why does meat never get put in desserts!!?

Am I making sense? Perhaps some examples would help. Below are some of the worst offenders in my humble (but completely correct) opinion:

1. Ham and Pineapple (on pizza, or otherwise)
This is just plain wrong. I don't like cheese and pineapple either, but mixing salty, delicious ham/gammon with sickly-sweet pineapple is pretty much unforgivable. You certainly wouldn't do it the other way round, would you? I mean, a friend of mine cooked an absolute gorgeous pineapple upside down cake the other week. It really was special. However, I would imagine that at no point within the process would she have thought to herself, "You know what would perk this recipe up a bit? Some nice slow roasted gammon! Yeah! I'll dice some up and throw it in the mix!"
It's absurd isn't it? And yet people think nothing of throwing diced pineapple chunks - or, unbelievably, WHOLE pineapple RINGS - onto their ham in savoury dishes. The mind boggles.

2. Pork with apple sauce
This is another one that gets me. Think about it - apple sauce is, effectively, a cold version of the filling that you would find inside a delicious, warm apple crumble. It's a beautiful, hearty and sweet dish. Quintessentially English. Now why on earth would anyone want to mix that with the salty excellence of some roast pork!? Would you throw a bit of crackling into your home made apple crumble? Of course you wouldn't! So why is it ok the other way around?

3. Turkey with cranberry sauce
People often complain that turkey is a very dry meat, and they use this to justify the use of cranberry sauce. FOOLS! It's the equivalent of putting strawberry jam on a roast chicken, essentially. It makes no sense at all.
There are two excellent sauces that can and should accompany turkey brilliantly, without the need to resort to putting sweet fruity jam on it. Firstly, there's a proper turkey gravy, which is a piece of cake to make once you've roasted your bird. And secondly, there's bread sauce - which is a subtle but savoury and tasty way to moisten and flavour the meat.
I might also suggest to those in the 'turkey is too dry' camp, that they try brining the turkey first, in saltwater. It flavours and moistens the meat brilliants. I tried this recently and received excellent comments from people who tasted it!

4. Raisin/sultanas in curry.
I can't even bring myself to comment on this abomination.

So - there you are. Fruit and meat should never mix. I think I've proved it fairly conclusively! However, I know lots of you right now are thinking of all sort of comebacks and challenges to my controversial statements. To try and anticipate these reactions, I will admit that there are certain caveats and exceptions to this rule, as follows:

1. Citrus fruits - mainly lemon - are allowable. Simply because I think we would all agree that they don't provide a sweet taste so much as a savoury tang to a food. Lemon chicken does not taste remotely sweet, and therefore, I'll allow it.

2. Pork and apple sausages. Cooking apples are not really sweet - certainly not compared to normal eating apples. When turned into apple sauce, cooking apples do become 'sweet' and are at that point it's unacceptable to add them to meat. However, a few diced chunks of cooking apple placed in a juicy pork sausage can just about be ok I think. They don't taste sweet.

3. Tomatoes - yes, yes, tomatoes are a fruit. But generally, they're not sugary sweet. They're salad items, and therefore, allowable.

I have a feeling this post may generate some debate. But BRING IT ON!

Wednesday 8 December 2010

Harmony

I'm in a very music-y mood today, following on from last the gig last night. I've been having a think about what sort of things draw me into a song. There are all sorts of things to attract you - obviously the melody, the beat, the tone, sometimes it's the specific part that one instrument plays. But for me, very often, it's harmonies that make a song for me. There's something magical - even spiritual - about voices in unison, each singing a different part but complimenting each other perfectly. Of course, it's pretty common to find harmonies in a song - and some do it better than others!
Here are some examples of songs/bands where I think the harmonies are just phenomenal, and lift the songs to a whole new level.

1. The Beach Boys

It's almost impossible to think about harmony without The Beach Boys springing to mind. Their dynamic - helped no doubt by the fact that most of the band were related to each other - was stunning, and created some beautiful musical moments. They could apply their harmonies to any type of song, be it a surfer-rock number, or a more thoughtful ballad. This video showcases their talents superbly. It contains vocal takes without the music underneath, from various classics of theirs. It's just beautiful.

2. Midlake - Head Home

A more contemporary number now. This track by Midlake is superb, with the harmonies setting the tone of the song. It's just perfect.

3. The Beatles - There's A Place

Again, The Beatles were past masters when it came to harmonies, and I could have picked almost any song. 'Michelle', 'In My Life', 'Here, There and Everywhere' all spring to mind as beautiful slow songs. But I went for something a bit more up tempo. I love McCartney's voice in this song, really belts it out!

4. Fleet Foxes - 'White Winter Hymnal'

Again, I could have picked almost any Fleet Foxes song - they're a band almost based on harmony more than anything else. But this song is particularly helpful in that it builds the harmony up bit by bit, and you can easily pick out the parts.

5. James Taylor - Shed A Little Light
This song came to my attention through the West Wing tv series (THE best tv series EVER), when Aimee Mann guests in the show, singing the number at a 'Rock The Vote' gig. But the original is by Taylor, and he and his signers knock it out of the park in this live version. Phenomenal and complex harmonies, with a gospel feel.


6. Harold Darke - 'In The Bleak Midwinter'

Forgive my venture into choral music, but this is my all time favourite piece of from that genre. It's not the traditional setting for this carol, but Darke's version has such beauty - especially in the beautiful 2nd and 4th verses, where the choir sing as a whole. Here, the Kings College Choir nail it.

7. Bob Marley and The Wailers - 'One Love'

And from choral Christmas carols, to Reggae! This one is so simple, so easy, but brilliant.

8. Paul Simon with Ladysmith Black Mambazo- 'Diamonds On The Soles Of Her Shoes'

It would be utterly irresponsible of me to do a blog on harmony without including some Paul Simon stuff with LBM involved. Absolutely top class.

Tuesday 7 December 2010

Gigs, music and memories

Just got home from a wonderful evening in the Manchester Apollo, watching Belle and Sebastian performing live with the London Contemporary Orchestra. Spellbinding stuff. B&S have long been one of my favourite bands. They're uncomplicated and I imagine, to many, unadventurous. But at the end of the day, they make a lovely noise.

This will likely be my last gig for quite some time. My wife - who I must say did brilliantly to last the whole gig without too much complaint - is 32 weeks pregnant with our first child. Suffice to say, things are going to change around here in the new year! Tonight then, felt to some extent like the 'end of an era'. Soon the days will be gone when we can decide on a whim to go to this or that gig or event, without having to arrange childcare or worry about messing up 'the routine'. Don't get me wrong, I can't wait for the baby to arrive! It's undoubtedly the 2nd most exciting earthly thing to ever happen to me (after getting married). But I'm fully aware that life is going to change forever, and I think I shall look back at this gig as something of a 'last hurrah' for this particular chapter of our life together. When I hear 'Fox In The Snow' in future, I think it will transport me back to this evening, a memory of a former way of life, shortly before a new adventure started.

Music has an incredible ability to do that. It's amazing how a certain track or album can transport you to a specific moment or period in your life. It might be a song that helped you through a hard time, or an album that provided a soundtrack to a great summer. Whatever it is, when you hear that music, you can almost palpably feel what you felt at the time you were listening to it originally. You can smell the smells, taste the tastes - all because you can hear the sounds. And these musical moments can mean totally different things to different people. I love that!

To illustrate my point, here are a few examples which are specific to me. Please feel free to add your own examples in the comments section below!

1.
The music: Radiohead - OK Computer (Album, 1997)
The memory: This takes me back to my first ever trip abroad - to Paris on a school trip in 1997. I had great mates in school - many of them I'm still in touch with - but not many were into the music I was into at that time. They all thought Radiohead were 'depressing' and 'boring'. They simply did not appreciate that the Oxford band had just released on of the greatest albums of all time. I don't want to give off the impression that I was some sort of anti-social music loving loner in school, who'd rather listen to melancholic indie than enjoy the excitement of Paris with my mates. But my distinct memory of this trip is that every time we were on the coach going from place to place, I'd be gazing out of the window, listening in awe to this album. At times, it would even send shivers down my spine.
Without a doubt, my favourite track was 'Let Down', and it helps my memory that this song didn't have a video to accompany it. When I hear it, I see images of Paris, as if seen from a coach window. I also can almost feel Frankie Wibberly volleying the back of my chair, as he did for the duration of the trip. The git.

2.
The music: Echo and the Bunnymen - 'Nothing Lasts Forever' (Single, 1997)
The memory: Glastonbury 2003. It's the Friday morning of my 2nd Glastonbury, and things have not started well. I've woken up to find that all my cash for the festival - nearly £100 - has been pinched from my wallet overnight. I'm distraught - to the extent that I ring home and have my mum in tears as she can tell how upset I am. I'd been looking forward to this for so long.
Me and my mate head over to the Pyramid Stage for our first gig of the day, but my foul mood is about to get worse. He gets a call from another friend who's just arrived on site, needing to be met and taken to our camp site. So I'm left in a field with 20,000 strangers. Angry, bitter and a feeling a long, long way from home. Oh - and then it starts raining too.
Anyway, on to the stage strolls Ian McCulloch and Echo and the Bunnymen. Now, it's important to note that Ian McCulloch is a self-absorbed, arrogant and idiotic human being. And he's a kopite. But he can write a tune, and somehow the set he and his band delivered that morning was exactly what I needed to hear. I was hundreds of miles from home and having a miserable time - fretting about money and how I was going to afford the rest of the festival. But here was a fellow scouser, telling me to just loosen up. Forget it! It's only money. 'Nothing ever lasts forever'.  By the end of the gig, I was beaming, and I had a fantastic festival. Whenever I hear this song now, I think back to that moment in a wet, lonely field, when a scouse pillock rescued my weekend and lifted my spirits. The clip below is the Bunnymen performing that song at Glastonbury - but from 1997.


3.
The music: Queen - 'The Works' (Album, 1984)
The memory: Whenever I hear a song from this album, I am transported to the middle of the back seat of our family car, wedged between my older brother and sister, and listening to my dad belting out 'It's a Hard Life' and 'Radio GaGa' thumping his fists on the steering wheel. I think it was a holiday to a farm in Devon that I associate this album with particularly.


The interesting thing about this ability of music to inspire memory is that it's not just songs you love and cherish that do it. Queen and Echo and the Bunnymen are by no means favourite bands of mine. I was kind of brought up on Queen, but I don't own any of their stuff and have no particular affection for their music itself. It's just the memories that that I associate with the tunes that give me some semblance of affection for them.

There are countless examples I could pick of songs that attach to memory. These were just a few to illustrate. Music is powerful stuff. Enjoy it!

Monday 6 December 2010

Top 5 Everton Moments (witnessed in person)

I'm a big fan of lists and stuff...it's a man thing. So I thought I'd kick off my blog proper with a list of my 5 favourite Everton moments which I was lucky enough to witness in the flesh. I make that distinction because I am one of those unfortunate fans who has never been able to afford the time and money it takes to be a season ticket holder. Growing up in Liverpool, I never had spare cash to get a season ticket. I got to loads of games (double figures every season), but never had the right lump of money at the right time to get a full season  ticket.
Nowadays I live in Leeds and whilst I can afford the ticket, I can't afford the time! My wife comes first.
While a lack of a ST has never dampened my passion and enjoyment, it has meant that I've had to witness a large number of great moments on tv instead of in person. Still - the 5 moments below will always live in my memory and often give me goosebumps just thinking about them!

1. Everton 0 - 0 Manchester United - FA Cup Semi-Final, Wembley, 2009. (Everton win 4-2 on pens)
Everton hadn't been to Wembley since 1995 (more of that shortly), so it was with great excitement that me and the lads headed down for  the big semi final against a rather under-strength (thanks Fergie!) Utd side. The match itself was somewhat dour - nil-nil - owing largely to the controversially awful Wembley pitch at that time.
Going to penalties was the last thing we wanted. Like the English national team, Everton had always gone to pieces when it came to shoot-outs. Our previous one had been a heartbreaking home defeat to Fiorentina in the Europa League, in which centre-back Phil Jagielka had missed the clinching penalty.
Just as well Everton's keeper on this occasion wasn't English, then! Tim Howard, America's number 1, produced two excellent saves in the shoot-out, atoning for Tim Cahill's earlier miss. All of which gave Jagielka a shot at redemption - the chance to fire the winning penalty. He slotted it home, and I'll never forget  the celebrations. Limbs all over the show! Z-Cars blaring out of the Wembley speakers. Hugging strangers. Screaming myself hoarse. And seeing the Utd end of the stadium empty in seconds! Bliss!

2. Everton 1 - 0 Manchester United - FA Cup Final, Wembley, 1995
Speaking of 1995, my first trip to Wembley was also a massive success! Again, Manchester United were the opponents, but this time it was in the final itself. Everton had started the season atrociously under Mike Walker, before club legend Joe Royle came in and turned the club around. He got the team believing in itself, restored the prided and fight that had been missing, and whilst turning around the club's league form, embarked on a brilliant cup run which culminated in this wonderful win over an excellent United side.
The game itself was again hardly a classic, but the win was all that mattered. Paul Rideout got the all-important goal, nodding home on the rebound after one of my favourite players, Graham 'Diamond Geezer' Stuart had thumped the crossbar.
My only regret about this game is that I was only 12 - so my celebratory drinking comprised of a can of Shandy Bass (0.1% ABV).


3. Leeds United 0 - 1 Everton, Elland Road, Premier League, 2002.
*see 2.26 into this video....

I was hardly full of confidence upon my first visit to Elland Road given than Everton hadn't beaten Leeds there in over 50 years! But under new manager David Moyes, Everton were ticking along quite nicely, and fans were excited by a young lad named 'Rooney' who'd burst on to the scene that season. A week or two earlier, he'd announced his arrival with a wonder strike at home to Arsenal. This time, he made a dazzling cameo appearance at a stunned Elland Road. It was 0-0 when Rooney entered the fray, having watched Tomasz Radzinski spurn a host of opportunities. Rooney only needed one. He picked up the ball, back to goal, and then drove forward, forcing Lucas Radebe into a furious backpeddle. Rooney waited his moment, before calmly slotting the ball inside the far post, and sending the massive throng of travelling blues into ecstasy. I was with my mate Tom Leadbetter, who lost his glasses in the melee! Even then we knew we were watching someone special.

4. Everton 1 - 1 Liverpool, Goodison Park, Premier League, 1997.
*see 1min10 into this video....

I've got an awful record of going to Derbies. I hate them, to be honest. I've never seen Everton win a derby in the flesh! But this is the closest I've come to tasting a derby win in the flesh. Everton were in turmoil going into this game. Joe Royle's stint in charge had started so brilliantly, but eventually fizzled out, and in the last couple of months of the 96/97 season, skipper Dave Watson took the reigns. Liverpool's spice boys were flying high under Roy Evans though, and they came to Goodison knowing that a win would keep them in the title race, but anything less would effectively end it. Robbie Fowler, Steve McManaman and co played some good stuff, and took the league when a player considered by many Blues to be the worst to ever pull on our shirt - Claus Thomsen - put through his own net.
Everton never gave up though, and their fight and spirit was typified by the talismanic Duncan Ferguson. He netted the equaliser close to full time - but it was a far from typical Ferguson strike. Famous for his towering, powerful headers, this time the Big Yin picked up the ball with his back to goal, 20 yards out, before spinning and unleashing a cracking shot into David James' bottom corner. Delirium!

5. Mnachester City 0 - 2 Everton, Eastlands, Premier League, 2010.

This one is especially for my mate Oggy. It may look like a pretty routine away win, but it meant a lot more than that. City had spent massive money that season, under their new mega-rich owners. Everton, under Moyes, had continually had to get things done on a shoestring budget. The tension between the clubs had escalated at the start of the season, when City very publicly unsettled and ultimately lured away Everton's highly rated centre back Joleon Lescott. It was a case of the haves and the have nots. City had the money to pay way over the odds to get their man. Eveton put up a fight to keep such a vital player, but in the end, money talked. Although Everton received a handsome wedge of cash (£24m) for Lescott, the damage his late departure did to the club was irreparable. Everton stuttered through the first third of the season, and eventually missed out on European football as a result.
On this evening though, some semblance of revenge was dealt out. It was big wallets v big hearts, and Everton won the match simply by playing as a team instead of as 11 very wealthy individuals. Goals from Tim Cahill and Mikel Arteta sealed the points. The fact that those two players we signed by Everton for a combined fee of under £4m rubbed salt into the wounds for City, whose £24m acquisition from the Toffees watched on from the stands, injured.

An introduction....

Hello and welcome.

I’ve been thinking about blogging for some time now. I love writing and communicating, and have always had a lot to say! I’ve just never quite got around to setting something formal up.
Unbelievably, it’s got to the stage where my own father, 59 years young, has beaten me to it and starting blogging himself (you can check out RevvyB’s blog in the ‘blogs I’m following’ section)!

So – what will I be blogging on? Well, as you’ll see in the ‘About Me’ section, my interests are fairly standard but include great variety – and they provide me with all sorts of things to think about, talk about and reflect on. Hopefully you’ll find them interesting too – and discussions/debates/friendly arguments will open up! I’m keen to hear the views of other people too.

By way of introduction, here’s a bit more detail on my interests….

1. God
I am a Christian. I was brought up in a Christian home, with my father working as a vicar. However, I was not forced or brainwashed into being a Christian myself. I made a clear, conscious decision when I was 16 to believe and trust that Jesus really is who he said he is, and have lived in the light of that ever since. Undoubtedly, the best decision I’ve ever made! I’m not going to ram my religious views down anyone’s throats in this blog – I never would. But my faith is absolutely integral to who I am, and it underpins every aspect of my life. It’s only right that it’s the first thing you know about me. 
I attend Gateway Church in Leeds with my wife, which is part of the New Frontiers movement of churches.

2. Sport.
I am passionate about sport. I just love it! The entertainment, the competitiveness, the challenge, the way it unites (and sometimes divides) people, the way different cultures engage with it. It completely fascinates me! And of course, like any self-respecting sports fan, I have strong allegiances to certain teams. There are various teams/players in all sorts of sports which I admire, but these three teams are the ones I support unwaveringly, and whose progress I monitor pretty much daily:

-         Everton Football Club.
Being brought up in Liverpool (a ‘scouser’), you are faced with a choice: Everton or Liverpool. The city’s two top flight football teams have battled it out for over a century, and between them have an impressive haul of trophies and honours. Liverpool is somewhat unique too, in that whole families can be split in their allegiances. I have a brother and father who support Everton (the major influences on my decision to do the same), whilst my older sister supports Liverpool, and my younger sister follows Manchester United (!). 
Being an Evertonian has helped to shape me into the man I am today. I have learnt to deal with disappointment, to cherish the high points when they sporadically arrive, and to never expect too much or get carried away!
Seriously though, the people I have met, the places I have been to, and the events I have witnessed while following this football club have created for me a wealth of great memories – and long may it continue.

-          Buffalo Bills.
American Football always used to baffle me, growing up. I could never quite understand what was going on! It was only in University, when I started to make an annual effort to watch the Superbowl with friends, when I really started to understand the game. The tactics are mind boggling, while the physicality is brutal but often unbelievably impressive. I’m now part of an ever-growing following of the NFL (National Football League) here in the UK. With games beamed over on to UK tv from America every week, more and more people are discovering the game over here, and I feel like I learn something new about the game every time I watch.

Why the Buffalo Bills, I hear you ask? Well, pretty much the first non-Superbowl game I watched was a Bills match, and they sensationally blew a winning position with a last minute collapse against the New England Patriots. During the game though, their fans had been brilliant. It was a partisan crowd at the Ralph Wilson stadium, creating an unbelievable atmosphere which came over brilliantly even watching on the tv thousands of miles away. The looks on the faces of those fans at the end really resonated with me! I instantly felt an affinity with them – perhaps it’s something carried over from my love of Everton! Anyway, from that moment, I knew the Bills were my team, and I’ve followed them through thin and thinner ever since!
My love for the team was solidified in a visit to Manhattan in 2008, where I watched a game with the NYCBBB (New York City Buffalo Bills Backers). A painful 10-0 home defeat to the San Francisco 49ers was made so much more bearable by all the beer I could drink and all the Buffalo wings I could eat for just $20!

-         England cricket team.
      I love cricket – and the England cricket team has always been an entertaining bunch! My early memories were of Gooch, Gower, Gatting, Malcolm and Russell. And I’ve watched as the game has become more and more professional and exciting over the years. The current crop is incredibly talented and on their day it seems they can beat anyone. It’s a great time to following English cricket. 
      I’m a keen player (although not at a high standard) of the game myself, and have always delighted in the nature of the game. The polite, gentile atmosphere, the leisurely pace, and the slow build up to an often exciting and nail-biting finish. Plus – any game where you get to stop in the middle for sandwiches and cake can’t be a bad thing! Whether playing or watching, it’s a wonderful social sport, ideal for building friendships.

3. Music
I’m not going to get all emotional and arty-farty about this – but suffice to say that music is really important to me. I have a healthy and ever expanding CD collection at home, taking in all sorts of different styles and genres, and I’ll no doubt share plenty of my favourite stuff with you through this blog.

4. Food and drink
Who doesn’t like food and drink!? But my particular passions at the moment are slow cooked meals and real ales. Again – expect to hear plenty on this subject!